In life we all have an unspeakable secret, an irreversible regret, an unreachable dream and an unforgettable love.
Without a doubt the year that has gone by was a tough for me. I was short on patience, and as a result handled my life a little more loosly than I should have. I started to doubt why My life was the way it was and the things that I thought I was missing out on.
But, Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our life. If we were to go through our life without any obstacles, we would be crippled. We would not be as strong as what we could have been. Give every opportunity a chance, leave no room for regrets.
Then came reflection in my self. I had to beg for forgiveness from the god above. I was wrong. In a moment or moments of weakness I gave in to Things I shud'nt have and took for granted the gifts that I had been given. This has taught me a pretty powerful lesson.
I prayed long and hard to be blessed with peace. It's all I ever wanted and want. With everything going on with people that are in my family and friends that I know, the problems i have been highlighting to myself are the least of any problems and should still be considered a blessing at the end of the day. Mom told me once, that maybe God did not want me to live the way I wanted to. May be he had a better plan for me and so gave me what I deserved the most. But as mentioned earlier, I failed to recognize god's gifts. A hard pill to swallow. Why would he deny someone who so much just wanted to love and cherish a life as much as any one did? I forgot how much I prayed and ask for the things that I have. Now I have them; 2 beautiful, heathly, loving children. A winderful family and a caring environment. God forgive me for taking for granted the beautiful gifts that you felt I deserved.
What's more loving than my son saying - " I love you mommy" or get to hear that concerned enquiry from my daughter when I am facing challenges. Those tiny hands and feet, the jhonsons baby smell, the little first steps, first words, first day of school, and beautiful family pictures, that awsome family time, the minor fights between my kids, those innocent complaint, oh the list just goes on and on. Im really blessed to experience these. I had not thought about how I would feel if tomorrow they were not there, and I had to go through the rest of my life without seeing what their full potential was or could have been.
My lovely kids, you mean more to me than any person on earth. you mean more to me than the ability to be an entreprenuer, and you mean more to me than any gift in the universe.
Children, remember, your amma loves you more than any of those things. One day, it wont be young anymore to take ur care. I wont be able to hold ur finger and take you out. I will in turn try to hold your finger and walk on. You will then no longer have to wait for me to come home from office, I will look forward to you coming home and talking to me. That day will come all too soon. So I will remember more everyday from here on out how important these days are and how I should never again take for granted the gifts named Nidhir and Hasanthi that God has graciously given to me, and trusted to my care for my entire life.
God thank you for making me realize that there is more joy to be found in a baby's admiration of his mommy than the love of any other person. I will love my family forever and ever and I promise to try harder to be a better mother and a better person.
Sunday, October 9, 2011
Thursday, October 6, 2011
A beautiful flower
The Most Beautiful Flower
The park bench was deserted as I sat down to read Beneath the long, straggly branches of an old willow tree. Disillusioned by life with good reason to frown, For the world was intent on dragging me down.
And if that weren't enough to ruin my day, A young boy out of breath approached me, all tired from play. He stood right before me with his head tilted down And said with great excitement, "Look what I found!"
In his hand was a flower, and what a pitiful sight, With its petals all worn - not enough rain, or too little light. Wanting him to take his dead flower and go off to play, I faked a small smile and then shifted away.
But instead of retreating he sat next to my side And placed the flower to his nose and declared with surprise, "It sure smells pretty and it's beautiful, too. That's why I picked it; here, it's for you."
The weed before me was dying or dead. Not vibrant of colors, orange, yellow or red. But I knew I must take it, or he might never leave. So I reached for the flower, and replied, "Just what I need."
But instead of him placing the flower in my hand, He held it mid-air without reason or plan. It was then that I noticed for the very first time That weed-toting boy could not see: he was blind.
I heard my voice quiver, tears shone like the sun As I thanked him for picking the very best one. "You're welcome," he smiled, and then ran off to play, Unaware of the impact he'd had on my day.
I sat there and wondered how he managed to see A self-pitying woman beneath an old willow tree. How did he know of my self-indulged plight? Perhaps from his heart, he'd been blessed with true sight.
Through the eyes of a blind child, at last I could see The problem was not with the world; the problem was me. And for all of those times I myself had been blind, I vowed to see beauty, and appreciate every second that's mine.
And then I held that wilted flower up to my nose And breathed in the fragrance of a beautiful rose And smiled as that young boy, another weed in his hand About to change the life of an unsuspecting old man.
- a repost cos it really touched me.
The park bench was deserted as I sat down to read Beneath the long, straggly branches of an old willow tree. Disillusioned by life with good reason to frown, For the world was intent on dragging me down.
And if that weren't enough to ruin my day, A young boy out of breath approached me, all tired from play. He stood right before me with his head tilted down And said with great excitement, "Look what I found!"
In his hand was a flower, and what a pitiful sight, With its petals all worn - not enough rain, or too little light. Wanting him to take his dead flower and go off to play, I faked a small smile and then shifted away.
But instead of retreating he sat next to my side And placed the flower to his nose and declared with surprise, "It sure smells pretty and it's beautiful, too. That's why I picked it; here, it's for you."
The weed before me was dying or dead. Not vibrant of colors, orange, yellow or red. But I knew I must take it, or he might never leave. So I reached for the flower, and replied, "Just what I need."
But instead of him placing the flower in my hand, He held it mid-air without reason or plan. It was then that I noticed for the very first time That weed-toting boy could not see: he was blind.
I heard my voice quiver, tears shone like the sun As I thanked him for picking the very best one. "You're welcome," he smiled, and then ran off to play, Unaware of the impact he'd had on my day.
I sat there and wondered how he managed to see A self-pitying woman beneath an old willow tree. How did he know of my self-indulged plight? Perhaps from his heart, he'd been blessed with true sight.
Through the eyes of a blind child, at last I could see The problem was not with the world; the problem was me. And for all of those times I myself had been blind, I vowed to see beauty, and appreciate every second that's mine.
And then I held that wilted flower up to my nose And breathed in the fragrance of a beautiful rose And smiled as that young boy, another weed in his hand About to change the life of an unsuspecting old man.
- a repost cos it really touched me.
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